The Magic in the Insane
by AnimalLoverAlly
Summary: Harley Quinn can rarely keep her mouth shut, so you would normally find her chatting about anything and everything, and so it's not a surprise when the villains of Gotham find out something particularly magical about their fellow criminal. She isn't the only one with this knowledge but in a world of flying monsters and supermen, who says magic can't exist?
1. Chapter 1

The night lingered on as the dark navy blanket of the sky was shielded by the choking thick grey smoke from Gotham. A few of its inhabitants were currently at Joker's club. The bright lights of the club shone in vibrant colours all around as drinks were handed around the large circular table. Cheers of laughter and smug grins were shared throughout the villain-filled room. Today was the birthday of the Harley Quinn, and as a result, many of her friends had come over to celebrate. It had also been a month after the 'saving the world fiasco' and while no one knew about the incident apart from the squad and Waller, people began to notice something different and off about Quinn, the fact she was gone for a while doesn't help her case. Surprisingly, the Joker had let Harley's friends from the squad come to his club as well as many other villains like Poison Ivy (whose guts he hates and would be dead if not for Harley.) Joker's hired staff had been shooed out, who were at first were expecting a paycheck but instead received a warning to exit quickly to leave room for the people coming. Most of the guests had arrived if not all looking at how many of the rogues were there just chatting to one another, or scheming depending on who you were talking to. As Harley wanted to spend her birthday with the maximum happiness achieved possible, she got her puddin' to bust anyone invited out of Arkham, which he did. So now the dark knight has a migraine.

Suddenly, a regal looking black-feathered owl swooped down through the top round window into the club circling around them, halting the party. Its eyes searched the crowd of people (if you could call them that) and it's piercing green eyes landed onto the addressed person... Harley Quinn. The blonde looked at it curiously, a feeling of similarity came which led her to gulp as she recognised the scarred left eye of the glowering bird. A snow coloured envelope fell onto her lap which was stamped with a family crest on it, two arctic foxes and an ebony-scaled snake stared into Harley's eyes as thoughts crept into Harley's mind. The dashing bird had landed behind its receiver on the leather curved couch that most of the Arkhamites were seated on, waiting for orders.

Harley slowly took the letter from her lap before dropping it again as Joker had suddenly questioned in a dangerous tone "Why is there a bird in my club? And now it's a messenger for you Harls? If this is a prank... so help me, Harley! I freaking HATE BIRDS!"

Harley glared at Joker, "Calm down Mistah J, just because Robin is based on a bird gives you no reason to disrespect my noble family's owl! Plus, you killed a Robin didn't you?" Harley laughed nervously when she realised what she just said as all eyes landed on the couple in both confusion and amusement as Joker smirked at the memory. Looking back down onto her lap, she took the letter in her pale hands. Inspecting it she slowly opened it neatly, placing the envelope on the table as she took out the piece of parchment. She opened up the flaps as the rest of the rogues started to lean in, eager to know what was inside.

"Harls, are you sure that this isn't some sort of trap? I mean, that looks pretty suspicious to me," Poison Ivy stated out of the blue.

"It ain't no trap, I'm sure of it. " Harley reassured Ivy when she picked it up. In cursive yet hurried writing she began to read. Harley cursed as she stood up from her seat and threw the piece of parchment onto the table. She rubbed her face with her hands when the rest of the rogues reached to grab the piece of paper. It was then that Poison Ivy grabbed it before Joker could read it and possibly rip it. She read it aloud so that everyone in the room could hear what the letter had to say. If anything, the reactions were varied, some were worried (probably at the subtle death threat), others looked confused and some just had the face "You're English?".

"Dear Harleen,

We know you no longer wanted contact with us so we allowed you to find your own way, one without magic. When we had found you in muggle college and gave us your wand, an extremely hard thing for any witch or wizard to do, we understood that you wanted to live your life away from magical England. While he won't try to hurt you, we wanted to send you a warning. He's coming for you Harleen, and he wants revenge on everyone who dared to lay a finger on his family. He's willing to kill anyone in his way just to get you back, just be careful.

From Lord and Lady Quinzel

P.S. As you know Tom has powerful magic but he can be dissuaded, just use your head and he's going to be there by 5:00, by apparition." Ivy paused and slowly put the letter back down onto the table before calmly saying, "Harley, what the hell does this letter mean?"

Harley's hands left her face, her blue eyes desperate for a moment before they hardened. Never had she looked so serious. She rubbed her arms, looking down to the tiled floor as if it was the most interesting thing on earth. "You were never supposed to know about all this..."

After a bit of contemplation Joker's face began to have a twinge of red. "Okay Harls, let's get this straight, someone is coming here to Gotham. Someone with magic, and as I quote 'powerful magic' is going to take you and possibly kill the rest of us."

Harley looked up again to see that Joker was steaming, he had edged to her face and she could feel his uneven breaths on her skin. His eyes were slightly crazed as the pools of green stared intently at Harley's blue ones. Her friends do seem to take threats quite seriously. She chuckled nervously, "Well when you put it that way it does seem a little on the downside."

"Who is this 'Tom' guy anyway? Sounds like a real douche, and you never mentioned anything about family Harley," Harvey said, flipping his coin casually.

"I never had to Two-Face, plus, it wasn't anyone else's business but mine," Harley glared at him.

The former politician rolled his eyes as he continued to flip his coin, "But, to answer your question, Tom is a... heh... it's kinda hard to say. I mean it's not exactly normal for anyone to say that 'there's a dark lord in my family'."

Jervis Tetch suddenly spat out his coffee, "Hey!" Scarecrow shouted, wiping his face with his sleeve, "that's just disgusting Jervis, and I thought you were a gentleman."

Ignoring the man next to him Jervis stuttered with a knowing look, "Do you mean Voldemort by any chance?"

"Oh yeah, I mean that's what the public call him, or well you-know-you or he-who-must-not-be-named," Harley nodded and babbled, exaggerating the titles that the wizarding community had given him," I mean, they just love their hyphens ri- Jervis! How do you know about that? You're not a wizard are ya?"

Jervis gave a dark look, "of course not, I would be somewhere else if I was one. My half brother was one, he's a half-blood, wouldn't stop going on about that piggywarts place. Until he was killed by a death eater."

"Oh, sorry about that Jervis. What was his name?" Asked Harley sincerely.

"David Tetch, but he was much older than me," Mad Hatter said thoughtfully.

"Wait, wait, wait, lemme get this straight. So there is this whole 'magical business' going on in England. With witches and wizards that can be good and bad, yet no one knows about them?" Joker placed his hands in his cane as he dramatically pointed it around as he spoke.

Harley nodded,"Well there is supposed to be the statue of secrecy. Not that magic is uncommon here specifically, but the magical communities tend to try and keep themselves secret, but they are pretty much stuck in the mid ."

"Outdated huh Harleen?" A raspy voice asked from behind them.

Harley turned to look behind her, finding the source of the voice "Oh, uh hi Tom."


	2. Chapter 2

Harley rubbed her eyes with the palms of her hands as the bright white light began to fade away, leaving black spots in its wake. The blonde criminal was utterly confused, but after several seconds she started to remember what had happened. Voldemort had done an ancient ritual turning her into an eleven-year-old and enrolled her into Hogwarts. Probably as punishment for living as a muggle, she thought. As the black spots left her sight she could see the warm colours of red and green, numerous lush trees which rushed past her as the familiar smell of chocolate frogs came to mind. Wait, chocolate frogs, she thought. The soft pigtailed platinum blonde hair flicking into the seated person next to her's face as she swung her head round.

"Hey! Watch it Harley! I swear! These pigtails are nothing but trouble, at least they aren't the tails of her old jester hat."

"Mistah J? Wait..." Harley rubbed her eyes once again as her vision began to focus. "Red? Pengy? Professah Crane? Kitty-"

"Okay Harls, we're all here and we can all see that. There's no need to say everyone's name," said a female voice, one belonging to a red-haired woman.

"Where are we anyway? Why do I feel so dizzy?" Asked Scarecrow.

Looking around again, the rogues noticed something... They were all mini versions of themselves! While they were all still wearing their 'uniform' per say, they were a tad bit annoyed at the fact that they were stuck in eleven-year-old bodies. Any adult who would walk into the compartment would probably think that all of these kids were going trick or treating for Halloween, making them seem cute, and some of them (meaning everyone but Harley) can't be cute. Just imagine the damage to their reputations...

"Harley... Why do I feel shorter... What the hell happened to my voice!?" Joker started to clutch his neck then started to laugh at the situation, "Oh, this is one great joke!"

He started to chuckle darkly before wrenching Harley's pigtail with his hand to be eye-to-eye with her, "But it's already starting to get old..."

Just before Joker could continue with his 'subtle' threat and Poison Ivy could smash his face in, the compartment doors opened, revealing a grey-haired woman and a tray full of sweets but before she could say anything, several pairs of eyes turned to look at her for a few seconds, blinked and then continued with their arguments. By the end of it, a few smug looking preteens gorging on sweets and a loathing Joker and Ivy were in the compartment. Several hours rolled by in silence, everyone adjusting to the situation before Edward had just begun to realise something.

"Hey Harley, where are we actually going?" asked the Riddler, twirling his mini cane in his gloved left hand.

Still stuffing her face with a chocolate frog, she gulped then said sheepishly, "Oh yeah, you guys don't know. Well at the looks of things, we're on the Hogwarts express. And probably on the way to Hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry."

"Wait, to a school of witchcraft and wizardry... But none of us even have magic, and what's up with us being turned into eleven-year-olds?" questioned Scarecrow, his eyes darting around the compartment.

"When you turn eleven, magical kids all over Britain are accepted into Hogwarts, though you can enrol if you know about it if your outside of Britain," answered Harley, not paying much attention to the others, and was instead trying to rip Dumbledore's card in half.

"But we don't have ma-"

The train came to a sudden stop making the villains jolt in their seat. As steam left the top of the scarlet train, the students of Hogwarts streamed onto the platform. Harley ran through the door shouting at her friends to hurry up, which they reluctantly did but they soon lost her as a group of first years blocked their way. Joker shoved his way through, his attitude and his pale skin and bright green hair receiving indecorous looks, with the others following behind him but soon losing each other in the crowd of all the students.

"Why aren't you wearing your uniform? We're already here!" said a know-it-all voice, belonging to a frizzy haired girl.

"Don't have any," replied Harley, looking at the girl up and down.

"Well I'm Hermione Granger, and you are?" asked the brown haired girl, expecting an answer.

Harley blew up some gum and popped it before putting her hand out to shake, "It's Quinzel 'round here I guess, but please, call me Harley, everyone does," Hermione shook her hand and the girls smiled, but Hermione soon frowned when she spotted the platinum-blonde haired prat, Malfoy.

"Quinzel huh? Never knew that one of them would come this year. Name's Malfoy, Draco Malfoy," the boy had a confident smirk glued to his face, Hermione glared at him while Harley analysed him closely, "Why are you not in any robes? Any dignified pure-blood would wear them."

Harley smirked back,"Well Malfoy, the name's Bond, James Bond." Hermione tried, but failed, to stifle a giggle as the blonde eleven-year-old used her hands to mock a gun.*

"But I thought you're a Quinzel," Malfoy lost his confident demeanour and adopted a confused one, scratching the back of his head.

Granger continued to laugh, "You don't get it do you? It's a famous quote from a movie. Of course you wouldn't know, most if not all purebloods don't know anything about the outside world."

"What's a moovie anyway? You're a mudblood aren't you," Hermione stopped laughing after hearing him insulting her heritage but Draco continued, "Come on Quinzel, let's get away from this filth," Draco grabbed Harley's arm but before he could lead her away a threatening voice sliced through the air.

"What do ya think you're doing with my girl?" Joker had gone through the crowd of students and went up to the small group of firsties.

"Your girl? Who are you anyway you freak? What are those markings on your body anyway? You have some too Quinzel," Malfoy was still holding Harley's arm when Joker smiled and the rest of the bad guys came out behind him, some with a raised eyebrow or amused expression. Hermione gasped, which led to her gaining Joker's attention.

"Malfoy, you should probably let go of Harley's arm," Malfoy smirked, still not letting go while Harley looked on deviously, "No, really Malfoy. If you want to keep your life you should let go."

"Oh lookie here mate. The girl recognises a few faces right. Hermione right? Yeah, your totally right. J here will probably kill the prat before we get to Hoggywarts or whatevah," The Aussie flipped a boomerang in his hand as he drank a last swig of beer.

"Not unless I smash his face in first, but more likely J will kill him first," Poison Ivy looked on evilly, a smirk on her face as she stared at Draco.

"Oh come on guys, why have so little faith in me? Plus your scaring Hermione over here," pointing to Hermione she continued, "And you know my kill count ain't much further away from any of yours."

Crabbe and Goyle were behind Malfoy but they were cracking their knuckles, as if to say that they could defend the albino ferret. They would probably win against any other first year, but up against super villains who killed people and fought Batman on a daily basis? They wouldn't last a second. Harley easily slipped from Draco's grasp and twirled him around while easily stealing his wand and walking over to her friends. She rolled her eyes at the dazed look and blew some hair out of her face.

Joker looked at the robed witch and wizard but then growled softly to Hermione, "Soooo…. Where'd you hear about us huh? You know who each of us are?"

Hermione gulped before answering, "I first heard about you from the news, then I researched a bit more and eventually found out more and more about what you did and stuff…"

Harley sighed and looked ahead, "Come on guys! There's no time for any identity crisis'! We gotta get onto the boat rides! They're one of the best bits of the journey!" She ran off to catch up with the rest of the first years pulling Hermione with her while Malfoy and his goons realised what she had said and strode like a pureblood (basically they 'ran') to catch up too. The villains looked at each other before walking quickly and following their jester friend.


	3. Chapter 3

A green-robed witch looked down on the new first years, scanning the stairs for any recognisable faces. She saw the nervousness in the muggleborns, the masks of some of the purebloods but a few bright colours caught her eye. There were students who weren't even in their school robes but were instead... Wearing muggle clothing and were in possession of muggle objects? After all the students came up the stairs, the ones in muggle clothing were looking annoyed apart from the blonde girl, who looked familiar somehow and was the one to come up last, she began her welcoming speech, introducing the students to the possible houses that they would be sorted into and the behaviour that was expected, which as expected, was given a few smirks. She left momentarily, leaving the students waiting on the cold stone steps to the great hall doors, most of them uneasy.

"What'd ya think is goin' on back in Gotham? The Bat is gonna get suspicious if we're gone for too long. Especially because all of us are stuck in this li'l mishappen," the Penguin looked at Scarecrow who was peering at the students around him.

"What I find interesting personally is that as we are the criminally insane of Gotham, we make it dangerous, yet when such a variable is removed, it would affect the entire order and the irregular balance that our dark city has, while one of us would probably take over another, with so many of us gone, I wonder what would happen, just who would replace us," Jonathan Crane replied smoothly. He was thinking about this for quite a while, looking at the possible outcomes of their little misadventure (oh how wrong he was) and realised that since so many of them were gone, someone had to be in their place, even if it was for the time being. The penguin just scoffed but Crane continued, "I never found school fun, there wasn't much for me to learn that I did not already know. The bullying was also a regular thing," The last comment was made coldly, Oswald Cobblepot was easily relating to this as he had gone through quite a lot of bullying himself as a child.

Platinum blonde hair could be seen barging through the small crowd, and no, it wasn't Harley's. This blonde was Draco Malfoy, the boy who was raised believing that blood was everything. Harley was born into the Quinzel family and they were mysterious yet weird. It was rumoured that their family could be traced to before Merlin, and this made them extremely old and powerful. They barely emerged to the public and tended to suddenly disappear, only when the children of the family needed to go to Hogwarts would the family ever be heard from. It was also rumoured that they would live in the muggle world, a place that few witches or wizards would venture into. But history aside, this didn't change the fact that the youngest Malfoy was striding his way with Crabbe and Goyle behind him. He coughed in a seemingly polite way, interrupting the mainly one-sided conversation that Harley and Hermione were having. Harley stopped the stream of her constant babbling and stared at Draco before giving him a sweet smile.

"I believe you have something of mine Quinzel," Draco stated, his head held high and eyes gleaming.

Harley gave a fake look of confusion and searched herself before saying, "Nope, nope... I believe you still have your ego." She gave him a smile but another boy, Blaise Zabini, turned around, facing them and refraining Draco from speaking.

"So this is the troublesome group of mudbloods then. And I would have thought that they would have at least tried to fit in by wearing their uniforms," Blaise sneered, also naively believing himself much higher than the group of rogues, "I suppose their clothes do show their worth, I mean, you all look like deranged freaks who definitely don't belong here. Their clothes are just terrible which they probably found in a gutter."

Hermione gasped but began to feel enraged at the dark skinned boy at his clearly prejudiced insults. She bit back her tongue before she could say something harmful back, something that she was used to doing back in Primary school because she believed that treating others the way she wanted to be treated was the right way to go. _Plus... He would get whats coming to him..._ Hermione stopped herself from thinking selfish yet reassuring thoughts just when Joker spoke, "Ding, ding, ding, ding! We've got a winner! You know, we are completely deranged and are freaks..." He smoothed his bright green hair back and taking out his custom made gun he threatened, "But this suit is worth more than your house, your money and your life combined. So don't try to insult me, little boy."

The muggleborns stared at them, turning to look because of the familiar sound of a loaded gun (A/N: movies people... Plus, guns are banned in England). They were terrified and their hearts were beating as fast as a race car would speed across the tracks. Another sound rang out through the air. The sound of a flipping coin from Two-Face's hand caused Joker to lower his gun and everyone to look at him. "Now I know you're a clown J, and I never thought that you could be funny... But my suit has much more worth than any of yours."

"How dare you insult my humour? You know, I wouldn't mind making that face of yours symmetrical," Joker laughed as he pulled out a knife pointing it at Two-Face.

"You don't scare me, clown. No one here thinks that you're funny. You can't even make Batman laugh. None of us can but I heard that your girlfriend pulled it off," Harvey smirked as Joker began to seethe, "and it was all because of how blind and stupid she is."

"HEY! I am not stupid! Nor am I blind! I have a PhD! If anything Harv' you're blinder than anyone here because ya have ta rely on a coin ta make your decisions for ya!" Harley spat back.

"Wait you made Batman laugh? The hell? I thought Batman was all brood and no laughter," Deadshot scratched his head, looking at Harley.

Poison Ivy replied for her with a groan, "She did, but everyone who heard in Arkham promised to not say anything." She emphasised her last few words while glaring at Two-Face, "Because we all knew that someone would get mad."

"Harley... If what they are saying is true... You'll be lucky if your body is found, undisfigured, at the bottom of the river. So tell me, have you made Batman laugh or not?" Joker, still a knife in hand cornered Harley by one of the railings.

Harley felt an unfamiliar boost of confidence, a want to stand up to her boyfriend. "So what if it is? He wasn't even being nice about it. The brooding bastard was being mean too."

Joker grabbed her chin, "So it is true then? When did this bullshit happen?" He looked into her eyes, waiting for the truth. But all he saw was defiance as Harley ripped her chin out of his gloved hand.

"Well, this 'bullshit' as you like to call it was when you pushed me out of a seven-storey high building, through a window using a swordfish. A damn swordfish! I absolutely hate fish!" Harley glared straight back. But Joker gave her a confused look.

"I said sorry, didn't I? I thought you forgave me after that. Plus, that was like... several months ago. You're still mad at me? Wait... Why did he laugh?" His eyes narrowed.

Edward Nigma... Being the intellectual idiot he was interrupted, twirling his cane about, "Well... I think this is the time for a riddle? I have an oldie but a goodie... Riddle me thi-" He was cut off by a punch to the face from Two-Face.

"No one cares about any of your damn riddles," Two-Face smirked but rubbed his head after it was hit by a steel blue boomerang. Captain Boomerang whistled lowly and smiled at the man with a half-damaged face.

"Whoops! You know, we really should be setting an example for these little kiddies. Punching is considered bad, you got that Dent?" He swigged open a can of beer before it was taken away from him by a large reptilian hand, "KC! Give me back my beer! That's my last one! I finished the rest back at the party!"

Killer Croc ignored the man who as reaching up for his beer and jugged it down before throwing the can down the stairs. "Now who's the hypocrite Boomerang?" Asked Two-Face, this time arms crossed.

Catwoman turned to Ivy, "Does this always happen? I'm rarely in Arkham so I wouldn't know," Her reply was grim.

"I suppose so... Only there's more violence but seems they're trying to keep it PG as of now. Hey! Killer Croc! Pick that can up right now! I better see you recycle it!" Ivy stormed off to lecture KC, who looked as if he just wanted to go on vacation to the Bahamas or something.

Catwoman mentally deadpanned herself. _This is why you don't hang round these people often if at all_ , she thought. Her head quickly turned round at the sound of a loud slap and a shout, "You psychopathic no good bastard!" The shout came from Harley whose cheek had a quickly reddening hand on it. Ivy turned around too, no longer focused at the massive crocodilian man but at the clown couple.

"Joker! I swear! You better get away from her right now or I'll shred you to pieces and ship whatever's left of you back over to Gotham and feed them to my plants!" Ivy stalked to him and punched him in the face but was quickly sent back by the force of Joker's kick to the gut. Captain Boomerang saw this as his chance as revenge against Killer Croc and threw a weak explosive boomerang at him while Riddler threw several explosive jigsaw puzzle pieces in Two-Face's direction. Riddler dropped one of his jigsaw pieces and instead of picking it up and throwing it at Two-Face, he picked up Neville's toad, Trevor, instead and he tripped onto Two-Face in surprise who also panicked who then landed on a retreating Mad Hatter who then lost his hat as it spiralled down to the bottom floor. Enraged he retaliated, and he pulled out a rather sharp quill. Deadshot just looked a tad bit lost, slightly new to the madness of his fellow villains. Scarecrow was writing notes in his portable notepad, he was writing about the reactions of Two-Face and Riddler to the toad, excited by the fear that they possessed for such a small creature. Harley deadpanned but just as she was going to separate her boyfriend and best friend up using her baseball bat, she spaced out before covering her ears in an attempt to block out the loud voices. Catwoman went to stand by Penguin and Deadshot, the only ones not fighting or having much involvement in the... arguement.

"So... What are we going to do about this?" She asked, looking at the mess of colours that was slowly but surely destroying the staircase. The crowd of students had given them quite a bit of space (which was nearly impossible so they just ran up to avoid the staircase). It almost seemed as if the teachers here were talking longer than needed for their own entertainment.

Penguin looked at his pocket-watch and began to adjust it, "Whenever anything like this happens, I just stand back and relax. There's no need for me to do anything," He took a few bullets from his back pocket and loaded his umbrella gun with it. Just in case.

Catwoman sighed, she just wished that she never came to that blasted party and instead went on that jewellery heist that she had planned a week beforehand. But she had to be that loyal friend and be there for Harley's birthday. She started to think about Batman, wondering what he must be doing. _Probably already searching around Gotham in a calm manner but secretly desperately, trying to find the whole lot of them_. She noticed the frizzy haired girl that they talked to earlier come up to them.

"So are you really from Gotham or are you just kids in costumes? Really... convincing costumes?" Hermione asked innocently, never really sure to the answer herself.

"Just look around kid, they can't get more real can they? I mean if the custom weapons and personalities and fighting doesn't convince you, I don't know what will," Catwoman replied honestly. She didn't really want to bother with lying, the other rogues were doing her head in. Another kid came up to her, he was followed by a ginger kid who was then followed by the blonde prat and his minions. The other students were crowding around her, many of them whispering amongst themselves. The purebloods, having no idea who these people are, were looking at them in disgust, ruffians would be the word they would use to describe them.

"Are you really from Gotham?"

"You're Catwoman!"

"You can't dress up as criminals!"

"We're going to die aren't we! Supervillains are here!"

"How were you accepted into this school?"

These were just few of the questions that she was asked but she just massaged her temples, already feeling a migraine trying to take over. A dent could be seen in the ceiling as Deadshot fired his wrist gun in the air, "Okay! That's enough! Someone would like to get your attention," He nodded is head to the woman at the top of the staircase, her face slightly red and eyes clearly showing annoyance.

"Thank you child, now after the sorting feast I would like the ones who did not see fit as to wear their uniform to come to the headmaster's office. Am I clear?" The fighting had stopped and the staircase was quickly fixed. Harley still remembered Professor Mcgonagall, and how stern she could be. She looked fearful of the woman and quickly said sorry which was replied to with a nod. _And I thought the Queen of Gotham never said sorry_ , was the thought that lingered for a moment in many of the rogues' heads. The children were briskly told to follow her through the large and intricate Great Hall doors and were met with four grand colours mixed in with black, red, green, yellow and blue. All of the children were amazed by the realistic night sky ceiling of the Hall and of the flickering candles that levitated throughout the room. _Just as I remember it_ , Harley thought as she looked round to find the familiar hat that had sorted her all of those years ago. The hat began to sing causing most of the hall to cringe while the younger students looked upon the hat in wonder. Shortly after the hat sung and bowed to the four tables, there were already whispers between the students.

"I'm not putting on that old hat! Do you know how long it took me to do my hair Harley?" Poison Ivy harshly whispered, while Joker and Two-Face rolled their eyes.

Harley glared at the eco-terrorist, "Red, it takes you a quarter of the time that it takes for me to do my hair! Plus, you never even have to try when it comes to your hair!" She didn't get why she was complaining, she basically has the best hair in all of Gotham. Plant pheromones do seem to do something to people, "And no... you are not seducing anyone with your pheromones! Ya hear me Red!"

Ivy simply raised an eyebrow but then turned back to the stool, she didn't notice the many children who were already being sorted. She observed the room around her, there was magic all around her. She was a woman of science though, and she wasn't really fond of all of this trippy stuff. It occurred to her that Harley went to school here, and that would mean that she has magic. The most possibly ordinary person in their little group, has magic. Despite her craziness, she would be the most normal person than the rest of them. She is the only person who ever got close to reforming, leaving Arkham declared 'sane' many times.

"There's not a witch or wizard who went bad who wasn't in Slytherin," A dirty-nosed red-headed boy whispered to the scarred boy next to him. The raven-haired boy just turned to look at him.

"Hey now, that's not true!" A feminine harsh whisper said to them, the boys gave confused looks, particularly the Weasley, "Slytherin is a house of ambition and cunning, not evil. Plus, it brings out the qualities that are useful in life. Especially if there's a dark knight chasing you."

Harry gave incredulous but quiet gasp while Ron scoffed, set in his ways about the Slytherin house, "You can't actually be Harley Quinn can you?" Harry received a quick smile and wink from said girl just as his name was called. He nervously walked up to the school thinking, _what if the hat doesn't sort me into a house? What if they just send me home? I don't want to go home!_ His thoughts stopped as the hat was suddenly placed onto his untameable nest of hair. Whispers went round again. This time they were focused on Harry Potter. Mad Hatter noticed Harley's eyes narrow at the 'hero', _probably something to do with **him**_ , he thought, him being their resident Dark Lord. His attention went back to the sorting as the boy was sorted into Gryffindor, _my half-brother was never extremely fond of that house, something to do with pranks._

The hero sat at the Gryffindor table, a happy look spread across his face. After each intended student got sorted, it left the de-aged bad guys in a tough situation. Their names weren't on the long list that Mcgonagall had. The old professor scrolled up the piece of parchment and saw the unamused costumed children. She looked to Dumbledore for help, this was something that had never happened before. The headmaster's silver beard, the only thing that stood out from the bright candles and rich house colours, glistened as Dumbledore began to think. _Now... This certainly is something new... They certainly are a colourful bunch aren't they?_

* * *

 _ **SO SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING! I have not updated in nearly 2 months and for that I apologise... So I wrote an extra long chapter for you guys and I hope it can make up for my absence... possibly... maybe not..**_

 _ **Anyway I was going to put their sortings somewhere in there but then thought on it and it could kinda mess up if everyone knew the villains' names (especially Joker's as even his name isn't completely official and it would be used for leverage by the other villains and stuff) so I tweaked the plot a little bit and ended up with this. And yes, the staircase was probably a tad bit too long but this A/N is too but it was also written without planning. I am still proud of this chapter that is quite long for me personally so I hope you enjoyed reading. They are still being sorted just not in the traditional 'name on parchment' way and ish. They were going to be sorted but I decided otherwise as I felt it belong in a whole other chapter... You also get to see more insight from the other characters and more HP characters, YAY!... That's enough from me and if you've reached this point... Well thanks I suppose. :)**_

 ** _-AnimalLoverAlly out._**


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